My Ifs Ands Or Butts On Gay Marriage

 

Yes... I said "Butts" to be a pun. Excuse me, I couldn't help myself.

Most people who know me know I'm all about free love. Period. Love who you love and love them well. With that being said, there's a lot of hoopla going on in the State of Alabama in regards to gay marriage. On Sunday, U.S. District Judge Callie V.S. "Ginny" Granade, struck down Alabama's same-sex marriage ban. I view this as a huge win for the State of Alabama and same-sex couples in our state. The ruling will likely be appealed and held up in our court system for years to come, but it is a step in the right direction.

 

Before you read further and comment with your bible verses and anti-homosexual nonsense, let me speak my piece. My peace may be different than yours, and that's okay. That's why we live in a great nation where you can speak your piece without fear.

 

I wholeheartedly believe in a clear separation of church and state. I do not believe that when our Constitution was written that our forefathers ever thought gay marriage would be an issue with the language it was written in. Do I believe that "marriage" should be between a man with a penis and a woman with a vagina? Absolutely. A marriage, a biblical marriage. There's my problem. Do I believe that two females or two males who love each other and have committed their lives to one another should be allowed the same benefits as a male and female who marry? Absolutely.

 

If I had it my way, the law across the board would be written as such: If you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, entitle each other to your benefits and medical coverage, and raise children together, whether that be male-male, female-female or male-female, you could take your happy asses down to the courthouse, pay them $20 and be "civilly unionized." Whatever you want to call it. If you believe in a "traditional marriage," after you visit the courthouse and make it legal, take your happy asses down to your church and have a traditional wedding. But I believe in the eyes of the law, it should be no different. It can certainly be different in the eyes of the church, but shouldn't be in the eyes of the law.

 

Imagine this: imagine you have been with someone your entire life. You've built a life with them, loved them, raised children together, been completely committed to them forever and they get sick. You two have no one else. Just each other and someone tells you that you are unable to make end-of-life decisions for this person who has been your spouse your whole life. In some cases, not even allowed to visit them in certain areas of a hospital because you are not considered "immediate family." Then imagine that your spouse dies. You are not entitled to their benefits upon death, such as retirement. If you had children together, but those children only happened to be "legal children" of you, they aren't entitled to your spouse's benefits either. What if at your job you were unable to cover your spouse under your health insurance benefits? Or if those children were legally theirs and not your own, be able to cover your children for healthcare benefits? They cannot take out life insurance policies in each others' name. How do you financially protect those you love if something were to happen to you? And imagine the difficulties filing taxes especially for gay, male couples in this state. Any male reading this, you know how this state rapes you on taxes, imagine now if your partner was also male, how many benefits you guys, as a couple, would be missing out on.

 

Not only are the above some problems they face, but further problems they face if they were "married" in a state that recognizes that union and move here where not only is it illegal for them to wed, but we do not recognize their legal union from elsewhere. The children they have adopted, loved and raised together now only have one parent in the eyes of the state. Only that one "legal" parent is allowed to make medical decisions for them. Example: my son had two legal parents, myself and Evan that were able to make necessary decisions for him. But, had his other parent been a female, she would have been unable to make medical decisions for him. What if he had to have a procedure done that a parent had to sign for. I was en route from Nashville by the time my son arrived at Children's, had he had to have an operation that would have saved his life, she would not have been allowed to make that decision absent my presence.

 

These are a few of the problems thousands of same-sex couple face every day. It's just the tip of the iceberg for them. I was raised in a Christian household. My parents do not believe in "allowing the gays to get married." They do not judge, they love everybody, but I also think that they are unaware of the problems these couples face. They know and love people who are gay, but they are older and may not understand legally what a gay marriage ban means for these people that they know and love. This seems to be apparent in many older people I talk to. All they hear is the "abomination" of letting the gays get "married." What they fail to listen to is the problems they face logistically from a financial standpoint.

 

So, to reiterate what I said above, I propose an equal, across the board "civil union" for everybody. Male-male, female-female or male-female that would entitle you to reap the benefits of sharing your life with someone financially and emotionally. But should you be religious and believe in a Biblical definition of "marriage," then after you ride down to the courthouse to ensure that you and your spouse are entitled to your legal benefits as a committed "married" "civil-unionized" couple, then take your happy asses down to your church and get "married" there.

 

I wrote this not from a Christian standpoint, but from a human standpoint and from a human standpoint, I believe in love. And I believe in protecting those you love. It's time that our nation, our state in particular, believe in love and allow those who love each other to also legally protect each other. Also, if you don't "believe" in gay marriage, don't have one.

P.S. I would watch the shit out of Gay Divorce Court. Can you imagine two Queens (<-- I hope that's not offensive) fighting over the Elton John box set? Amazing.